I've been afraid of spiders for as long as I can remember. I'm not sure why, or if there was an event that triggered this fear; but regardless, my fear was real - and definitively irrational. I had several rules that helped me co-exist with these eight-legged creatures. 1) If a spider touched me/got on me it had to die. 2) If a spider was in the shower when it was time for my shower it had to die. 3) A spider could hang out in most of the rooms in the house as long as I knew where it was at all times. If I lost sight of it, well then, the next time I saw a spider, any spider, it had to die. 4) If a spider came anywhere near the head of my bed, and god forbid my pillow, the whole house would get fumigated. As you can see I spent a lot of time and energy towards a creature I wasn't fond of.
The last straw occurred when I was working with an organizing client. We were sitting down working on a project when the client pointed behind me and said (calmly I might add), "Oh look, it's a spider." With the speed equal to a launched rocket, I bolted up from my chair, threw my pen and paper down as I ran across the room. I think I even screamed; however, my client doesn't recall. Fortunately my client was so focused on retrieving the spider to take outside that she didn't even notice my reaction. Thank goodness. However, I felt like a complete idiot and certainly didn't think I exhibited behavior becoming a professional.
What did I believe? "Spiders had the power to hurt me if I let them."
Fortunately I was introduced to PSYCH-K™ soon after that incident. Elizabeth Powers, my facilitator, worked with me to figure out what I wanted to believe about spiders. What I really wanted wasn't to change my belief about them, but to change my reaction to them. I wanted to be able to see a spider and remain calm. I wanted to be able to put a glass over the spider, slide a piece of paper under it, and carry the contained spider outside – as an option to killing it. When I described this action to Elizabeth it made me nauseas. The belief statement we came up with was, “I am safe and secure in the presence of spiders”. Two hours after I balanced for that belief statement I saw a spider on the living room wall. Without thinking, I went to the cupboard and took out a small, clear glass; went to my office and retrieved a small, stiff piece of paper; and then went up to the spider. Again, without thinking about it, I placed the glass over the spider, slide the piece of paper under, and walked the contained spider up the stairs, out the door, down the sidewalk, and over to a pile of wood – away from the house. I then removed the piece of paper and emptied the spider from the glass onto the woodpile. As I turned back to the house I realized what had just happened and burst into tears. I had just taken out my first spider and it was okay. I was okay. (It brings tears to my eyes and a smile to my face just reliving that experience.)
My “spider rules” still remain about the same; however, now I have a choice. I can either take a spider outside, leave it alone, or kill it. And I am able to remain calm through the process.